Dear Amy: I am struggling with the fact my husband’s family refuses to get vaccinated. These unvaccinated family members are also traveling across multiple state lines right before the holidays. My husband understands that we shouldn’t celebrate the holiday with his unvaccinated family members, but he says that in turn, we shouldn’t see my widowed 75-year-old mom who, like us, is fully vaccinated. It’s like he wants to punish both me and her because he can’t be with his family. He and I routinely see my mom — we go on walks and share dinners, but he says that if we don’t have a meal with his family, then we can’t have one with my mom, even though they have a great relationship! I’ve even suggested that it doesn’t have to be a full traditional dinner and that we could do something different this year, but he doesn’t seem responsive. I am so confused, as he and I both agree about how frustrating it is that people carry this mentality of “not my responsibility to care about anyone but myself.” I just lost my job, which provided health insurance for both of us, so we cannot get sick! I don’t know how to handle this.

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