Dear Amy: I am in a long-distance relationship with a lovely man that I met when we were in school. After graduation, he had to return to his country of origin because he could not get a work visa. He is unhappy with his work, and wants to quit, move here, marry me and work on getting his visa while I support him financially. The problem is that I have two kids and a very low-paying job at the moment (I’m an intern at a local mental health agency.) I can’t support him, and he can’t work here without a visa. I’m content to have each of us work at our respective careers until I can either actually support him financially, or until he reaches a point in whatever career he chooses that he can get a work visa here in his own right. He tells me that he doesn’t know how much longer he can live with this situation, but I have a career to launch and two kids to raise. Is it reasonable that I don’t want to jeopardize my financial and career future when it feels like I might be enabling him to commit career suicide? He has said that he might have to look for jobs in other countries, etc., and I understand this and support him in doing what he needs to do.
Comment on Ask Amy: Overseas lover pressures woman for quick marriage
Amy Dickinson, Denver Post: Living
Sun, 06/17/2018 - 3:30am
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