“DEAR DICK,” begins the pilot of “I Love Dick,” in all-caps cards: “EVERY LETTER IS A LOVE LETTER.” The cards are narrated by Kathryn Hahn’s character Chris Kraus, a filmmaker whose name’s unfortunate similarity to ‘90s hip-hop duo Kris Kross is just part of her tragically unhip personality. As Chris, Hahn’s narration is monotone, flat,...