Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So each week, we round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Parenting: where being able to hear a pin drop is either blissful or terrifying.— The Mehsozoic Era (@TheAlexNevil) May 24, 2017 Imagine having kids and also being able to concentrate on something hahahaha— SpacedMom (@copymama) May 22, 2017 My kids throw a lot of shade for tiny people completely dependent on me for survival.— Ponies and Martinis (@PonyMartini) May 24, 2017 I feel like I don't get enough credit for all the times I only screamed at my kids in my head.— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) May 22, 2017 I am "my morning was spent investigating WHO tossed underwear into the toilet" years into parenting— dadmissions (@Dadmissions) May 22, 2017 [Me after 10 minutes at the playground]Omg, we've been here for like a million years.— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) May 20, 2017 Just heard 7yo yell out from the other room: "You'll never get away with this!"I'm a little scared but excited to see how this plays out.— Winey Mama (@coffeeAMwinePM) May 21, 2017 I bet the person who invented the MUTE button on your phone was a parent who worked from home.— Ilana Wiles (@mommyshorts) May 23, 2017 I'm just your average mom, trying to convince my kids that 4:45pm is indeed their bedtime, because I've had enough of their shit for one day— Dragging Feeties (@DraggingFeeties) May 24, 2017 My signature move is buying something "for the kids" and then eating the whole thing before they get home— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) May 24, 2017 When I finally teach my youngest to blow his nose & cover his mouth when he sneezes, I will consider the hardest parts of parenting over.— Meredith (@PerfectPending) May 24, 2017 If you miss your children just find a quiet place to sit by yourself and relax.They will find you...— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) May 25, 2017 Parents who send your children to school with brushed hair in May, I salute you— Farah Miller (@farahlearned) May 23, 2017 Sometimes you eat a gourmet meal & sometimes you stand in your kitchen & eat your kid's leftover nuggets and tots.