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Dear Amy: I’m a 57-year-old man.
I was recently diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer.
I am obviously not overjoyed, but I am totally accepting of this news. Living with — not dying of — cancer means a few lifestyle changes and the need to be more aware of things.
My cancer is not curable, but it is treatable; similar to many other illnesses.
I have a large circle of family, friends, and acquaintances who have been supportive of me during my life.
I have chosen to share my diagnosis with only a few of them.
While I’m OK with my cancer, I know it isn’t going to be well received by most people, and so that’s why I’ve decided to keep it private.
I hate seeing people I care about being in pain and/or distressed and knowing the knowledge of my illness will cause this in turn causes me much more pain and distress than the cancer ever will.
These folks would definitely step up and help in whatever way they can.
I know that after I pass and the news of the cancer becomes known, many of my friends will be blaming themselves for not noticing “the signs,” and will feel awful for that as well.
I don’t want people to fawn over me and treat me differently, but I feel guilty about keeping this a secret.
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I’m not sure what I’m asking you for, but I’m at a loss about what I should do.
Thanks for being here.
— Accepting my Diagnosis
Dear Accepting: I’m impressed by your equanimity regarding your diagnosis, but I think you’re also getting a little ahead of yourself.
It is natural to see your future in a telescoped way right now, and you seem to be focused on anticipating not only your ongoing feelings, but the feelings and reactions of others.
But people are complicated, and feelings (including yours) change through time.
You should anticipate that the news of your diagnosis could leak out, and if so, other people will react across a spectrum.
Spotify is still the world's most popular music streaming service, but now could be the right time to switch to Apple Music. Beyond further planned price increases, Spotify's interface could be another reason to change. Learn why you may want to switchand why I didbelow.
Connections requires players to find the connections between 16 words, and place them in four groups of four. If you want some help, we have the solution to Connections for May 10, 2024, along with hints to help you solve it yourself.
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Microsoft is banking heavily on Copilot to take Windows 11 to the next level. It integrated Copilot into Bing and then added it to Windows 11 with the 23H2 update. However, while Microsoft positions Copilot as an AI assistant that can make your life more productive, it doesn't quite measure up to those claims yet.