Life Deconstructed: Peter Gets Credit, But Mrs. Cottontail Does The Work

Here comes Peter Cottontail? Child, please. If Peter Cottontail comes hopping down the bunny trail, then he’s lurching toward the Hare Bar and Grill to pound back a few carrot daiquiris; he’s most definitely not hopping toward Target to charge last-minute Easter basket treats, then doubling back toward the Dollar Store to grab more straw for the stupid baskets. He’s not using MapQuest to locate the Valley’s best bone-in ham, hunting down the tastiest kielbasa and debating whether the store-made lemon meringue pie can pass as his own if he transfers it to a fancy pie plate. No. Peter doesn’t have a damn thing to do on Easter.