Famed cartoonist Don Asmussen has been complaining to The Chronicle sports editor that my Sunday columns are so long and slow-paced that by the time readers get to the end, they’re too tired to drop to the bottom of the page and read Asmussen’s cartoon. Columbus spent less time planning his first voyage than the average PGA Tour golfer spends lining up a 15-foot putt. NBA players are allowed 10 seconds to shoot a free throw, but that limit is not enforced, so guys take coffee breaks between shots. Speaking of a pitch clock, how about a pitch clock for the TV commercials between innings? Just as the 24-second clock killed the NBA and the 35-second clock killed college basketball. MLB’s goal, according to stories and headlines, is to “lure” young fans to the game. On ballpark video screens, replace player photos with Don Asmussen caricatures of the players.

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