Dear Amy: I’ve been married for 30 years, I believed happily. My wife was never demonstrative emotionally, but I believed that we loved each other. Three years ago, she told me that she was no longer interested in sex, and didn’t see that changing. This was a surprise to me, but the one rule of our sex life that she always insisted on was that we not discuss it. We saw a counselor, and it helped with other communication issues, but after a year, she said she still “doesn’t see anything changing.” We still live together, we’re still friendly, we have a young adult child who hasn’t left home yet, but there is no physical contact between us, no matter how casual or innocent. She didn’t offer as much as a pat on the shoulder when I got laid off, or when I took our elderly cat to the vet to be put to sleep.