Dear Amy: My wife of 20 years surrendered her daughter, “Betsy” for adoption 30 years ago. My wife and I were reunited with Betsy 10 years ago and have become very close, although Betsy lives in a different state. Betsy and her adoptive parents have become estranged over the past few years. So now Betsy wants to divorce her current adoptive parents because of what she feels are irreconcilable differences, and for (future) legal reasons that also involve her daughter (who is 8 years old).